I have not always been able to practice mindfulness. It has only come with age. Honestly, when I was younger, it was much harder to be mindful of my presence. I had work, school, small kids to raise, a busy husband. I am sure if someone told me that I needed to live mindfully, I would have jumped over the edge of insanity. Sadly, now that I look back, I also believe that I may have missed some of the sweeter moments of our lives because I was so young and surviving.
As I started this project, I realized that I could finally give my attention to my present actions of creating. One part of that was spending enough time daily to writing. The act of free writing always sharpens my attention to look at my current moments.
I learned my need for applying mindfulness into my everyday life when one of my co-works did not practice mindfulness. Matter of fact, this co-worker was one of my supervisors only a few years ago. He was not able to take a moment to be in the present when he spoke with me; he was unable to experience my thoughts & feeling without judgment.
Now, he never openly expressed his views with me around his judgments, but it was evident when I spoke with him he had little time or patience with what I said. He would never remember any comment I would make during our weekly meetings. Matter of fact, I believe his value of me was so low, he would often skip over me in group discussions, as if I did not exist.
His demonstration of the lack of mindfulness (among other unkind traits,) regarding me and my value was life-changing. Not only did it move me into a dark time of self-doubt & lack of confidence, but it also made my working days traumatizing. A part of me wondered if he even realized how his actions were changing my daily view of my role.
Thankfully, I woke up & I survived. I did come away from that working relationship with a much-needed lesson. I now wish to practice mindfulness in every aspect of my days. No matter if I am interviewing an author, making dinner with my husband, sharing lunch with one of our daughters, talking to a student on the phone or walking our dogs—mindfulness matters.
I cannot help to believe that an individual who operates with mindfulness with those around them are acting with love.